The Bulldog Bar Liquidation Mystery
In 2006, I had to put down my beloved English Bulldog, Bella. This love of bulldogs and a sort of twisted, backwoods "Cheers" bar led to our 2011 collaboration of The Bulldog Bar Liquidation Mystery.
Set in Georgia, the Bulldog Bar
is home to many a strange regulars and they've all gathered at the bar to ride out the approaching hurricane, Shaniquewa. The show opens with a voiceover instructing everyone to stay inside to ride out the storm.
The Bulldog Bar is owned and by Boo Daily and has a staff of four - Billy Bob, Fanny, Betsy Mae, and Sissy. The regulars include Vern, who never speaks; Flo who is a horny old woman and tries everything she can do to get someone to take her up on her sexual advances; and Jimmy Joe Bob, the town drunk - something he is very proud of. On this particular evening, BiggieLittle, the local band has arrived to audition for extra gigs.
When Betsy Mae receives a mysterious letter, the audience has to decide what it could be about: the identity of her baby's daddy; whether or not she's pregnant; if she got accepted into college; an audit from the IRS; or a determination on her unemployment. The show proceeds dependent on the vote by the audience.
The gang is visited at one point by Abigail, an annoying little girl selling candy bars to raise money to go to Florida. "You goin' to Disney World". "Nope. The greatest sporting event in all the world! Daytona 500." Abigail gets the audience involved by seeking help with her candy bar sales.
BiggieLittle now has to audition, which is strange to say the least. They render some of their classics - "I've Got No Underwear", "Blue Drain Blues", and a few more. The audience is then invited in a sing along to "I've Got No Underwear" and "Pine Pitch Penis", and trust me when I saw, they loved "Pine Pitch Penis", even asking if they could take the lyrics to deer camp with them!
All hell breaks loose when the lights go out, shots are heard, and sweet Betsy Mae is found dead on the floor. Fanny recruits BiggieLittle to put Betsy Mae in the freezer "on the opposite side as the pig's feet.
They's for tomorrow's special". Boo seeks po-lice help from the pre-appointed audience member who then comes on stage and questions the regulars, following which the audience is encouraged to offer up their own questions.
In the end, Boo shoots the regulars, except the non-speaking Vern, telling the audience that he was having an affair with Betsy Mae and didn't want any of them to go telling on him. He spares Vern, knowing the old man hasn't spoken to a soul in over 20 years. In response, Vern shoots Boo and, in the funniest closing imaginable, tells the audience that Boo "wasn't the only one tapping that sweet young thing"!
The audience is encouraged to dress the part of hillbilly and join in the fun. Set includes a bar and minimal seating. Sound effects include wind and rain. This show includes 3F and 5M. The part of Flo and Abigail are played by the same person.
AUDIENCE REACTION:
This show was a riot to put on for audiences, who never ceased to amaze us. After opening night, when the audience seemed to want to learn the songs performed by BiggieLittle, we added a sing along of the two favorites - "Pine Pitch Penis" and "I've Got No Underwear"! This production is definitely a non-thinking, hilarious time for audiences that just want to laugh, forget their cares, and belly up to the bar.
